ACS Survival Guide 101

Hit List to Survive in the old Barker Campus

1. Thou shalt always wear school badge for fear of pinch on nipples by Farmer Chan.
2. Thou shalt avoid Farmer Chan at all cost to prevent smack on backside
3. Thou shalt wear pants 2 sizes bigger that it hangs on yer hips n sweep the floor
4. Thou shalt always have a hairspray n pointed orange comb in hand
5. Thou shalt not leave plate of potato wedges unattended for fear of free-loading from the usual suspects
6. Thou shalt always throw wet toilet paper on the ceiling
7. Thou shalt always keep fire extinguisher box key handy for storage of handphone, discman n pager
8. Thou shalt use distilled water bottle as a water gun
9. Thou shalt eat chee cheong fun carefully for fear of spattering sauce on shirt
10. Thou shall go to toilet during change of period to comb hair
11. Thou shalt use paper given out during chinese period to make paper aeroplanes
12. Thou shalt only use pink plastic ball in school quadrangle
13. Thou shalt always support Shaw pool chicken wings and chicken pie
14. Thou shalt always listen for head prefects warning n remove books from under table in time to prevent confiscation
15. Thou shalt doodle on table whilst bored
16. Though shalt use rubber under chair n desk as a projectile for defense measures
17. Thou shalt always eat Sochews n Menthos in class
18. Thou shalt sneak in from Oldham Hall n head straight to class when late
19. Thou shalt always soak chicken rice with beef gravy and chilli
20. Thou shalt proceed to Cyberdome after school
21. Thou shalt never ever incur the wrath of Sunny Ng
22. Thou should always bring school tie on Monday or risk standing at the back throughout chapel
23. Thou shalt put bible in place quietly
24. Thou should never ever pontang school leaving by the church driveway
25. Thou shalt sleep in class tactically
26. Thou shalt always make fun of Lalita
27. Thou shalt never offend Chao Typhoon
28. Thou shalt always keep clear of Chao Typhoon after recess
29. Thou shalt always remember Julia Lee's butt without fail
30. Thou shalt always support n show face but never take part in confrontations
31. Thou shalt always use OHP projecter as mirror
32. Thou shalt believe Cross Colours, Airwalk n Alien Workshop are cool
33. Thou shalt never miss a school outing in foreign countries
34. Thou shalt never throw rocks in the field for fear of hitting sumone's head
35. Thou shalt always choose truth instead of dare
36. Thou shalt always make fun of Chinese High n Cat High wearing shorts for 4 years and showing their leg hair
37. Thou shalt always believe chinese lessons are a waste of time
38. Thau shalt always remember these following names: MGS = Monkey gal skool, SCGS = Singapore Chao Gu Bak School, St Marg = Polka Dot Skool and NYGH = 80%, 20% rule
39. And make fun of our House's names: CKS = Chia Kao Sai, GHK = Go HK and Thoburn = Toe Burn
40. Thou shalt tear victims underwear leaving them underwear-less n give wedgies
41. Thou shalt understand that any undone homework can be copied in the morning
42. Thou shalt never forget the body slam incident by Jonny on Li Jing
43. Thou shalt always disturb feminine people like Jason Tan n frens
44. Thou shalt believe that John Chao can be bribed by food
45. Thou shalt never get to know gals from IRC cuz u never know what u are gonna get
46. Thou shalt pass on IRC gal's number to buddies to get rid of them
47. Thou shalt carry a fake JPG wallet regardless of size n length
48. Thou shalt always visit the dentist during lesson times
49. Thou shalt always forget to bring textbook so that you can be sent out of class to talk to your buddies who are also outside
50. And finally...my favourite one...thou shalt NEVER EVER shine the laser pointer at female teacher's backside especially when sitting at the back seat