It's 3 am!

I can't seem to fall asleep. Its already 3 am. I remember Guang Liang's Yue Ding...I really love that MTV. I'm tink I'm a sucker for this type of music videos. How long do I have to wait for her...3 years, 8 years, 10 years? Or it will never happen again? Will we ever meet again? I don't know...maybe under different circumstances perhaps? Some scenes of the music video reminds me of the happier times we shared. Promises we made were broken...why? It seems I can trust the other specie any longer. Just being friends again seems so funny after so long together...or is it I'm just trying to run away from facts. Will she appear before me just like in the MTV? I guess not...I don't tink it would happen...maybe having a little hope might help...but in my heart I know it is just a foolish thought...I just can't seem to understand myself. Why do I continue hoping when she's long gone already...it's so hard to comprehend. Well...I've got 2 pals that understand how I feel since then...cuz it happened to them too. Maybe being nice guys never helps...you get hurt again and again. They treat you like a toy...one minute needing you so badly and then suddenly, you become like dirt...and it just had to be the person you loved most. Should we start hurting people rather than be hurt? Jerks does that, and they get away with it. It's somehow not fair...but then again...what is fair? I'm slowly going insane without an aim...the pain is eating through my soul...my heart was already long gone...shattered inside out...a person who has lost his faith and to a certain extend disillusionised. At 3 am in the morning and I'm posting such crap...I beg your forgiveness. Hope my male PMS would somehow end soon.